72nd Golden Globes Play-by-Play

Welcome to the Madness Brewing live blog of the 72nd Golden Globes. I will be offering my opinions on the telecast and spouting nonsense all night long. If you haven’t yet heard my predictions for tonight’s show, you can download the podcast with this link. I will be recording a post-show podcast after everything is wrapped up.

Click more to begin reading the live blog.

8:00PM – The show has started on time. This may be the last time things go well tonight.

8:03PM – So far, it’s just been three minutes of name-dropping with jokes.

8:08PM – This duologue is way toooooooooo long.

8:11PM – Finally, they’re starting to give out awards.

8:11PM – Jennifer Aniston can’t read. For reals.

8:12PM – WINNER: Best Supporting Actor – J. K. Simmons (Whiplash)

8:13PM – Watching J. K. Simmons on stage really makes me miss Law & Order.

8:14PM – Anticipated “Fifty Shades of Grey”? I don’t think so.

8:16PM – WINNER: Best Supporting Actress in a Mini-Series or TV Movie – Joanne Frogatt (Downton Abbey)

8:20PM – At this pace, we’ll be finished the show sometime around 2AM. The show is supposed to finish at 11PM

8:22PM – That was an introducing introduction there, Jeremy Renner, you know.

8:23PMWINNER: Best Mini-Series or TV Movie – Fargo

8:24PM – It’s amazing how much Colin Hanks looks like his dad.

8:25PM – Jeremy Renner is really saying some interesting things. It’s too early to be this blitzed.

8:25PM – WINNER: Best Actor in a Mini-Series or TV Movie – Billy Bob Thornton (Fargo)

8:32PM – Yes…seven minutes of nothing.

8:34PM – Perhaps 2AM was way too optimistic. Seriously, nothing is going on. Just lame North Korea jokes.

8:36PM – 11 minutes between awards.

8:37PM – WINNER: Best Actress in a TV Series – Gina Rodriguez (Jane the Virgin)

8:38PM – The only woman who’s from broadcast television nominated won the award. Maybe we’re seeing a swing back to the networks. Probably not.

8:40PM – WINNER: Best Television Series – Comedy/Musical – Transparent (Amazon)

8:43PM – ANGELA!!! I’m sure there was a speech happening but when I saw Judith Light, I could hear Tony Danza’s voice ringing in my head.

8:48PM – Seriously, can people in Hollywood read? Is there something wrong with the teleprompter?  First Jennifer Aniston, then Naomi Watts, and now Melissa McCarthy have all botched lines.

8:49PM – WINNER: Best Original Score – Johann Johannsson (The Theory of Everything)

8:50PM – That was a weird one as according to Goldderby.com, Johannsson was the long shot.

8:51PM – WINNER: Best Original Song – Glory – Selma (John Legend and Common)

8:59PM – These jokes are just dying a slow death.

9:00PM – They just started announcing nominees without announcing the category.

9:00PM – WINNER: Best Supporting Actor in a Mini-Series or TV Movie – Matt Bomer (The Normal Heart)

9:03PM – Ricky Gervais is presenting. He should be hosting.

9:05PM – Gervais wasn’t even on for two minutes and he may get the most press for a couple of the jokes he made. To be fair, they were really funny.

9:05PM – WINNER: Best Actress – Comedy/Musical – Amy Adams (Big Eyes)

9:14PM – Just announce the winner already!!! That was annoying. Why does anyone want to watch Kevin Hart?

9:15PM – WINNER: Best Animated Film – How to Train Your Dragon 2

9:17PM – It’s ridiculously stupid that the presenters get all the time to screw up their lines and trip over each other yet people who win a award get cut-off because the show is starting to run long. The reason why most people are presenting is because they’re not (and in the case of a good portion of them, will never be) nominated.

9:19PM – WINNER: Best Supporting Actress – Patricia Arquette (Boyhood)

9:26PM – Tiny Fey and Amy Poehler have done more North Korea jokes than anything else. What a waste of two funny people.

9:28PM – Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig are bombing on stage too. What’s wrong with the SNL alums tonight (Seth Meyers was pretty bad too)?

9:29PM – WINNER: Best Screenplay – Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu, Nicolas Glacobone, Armando Bo, Alexander Dinelaris, Jr. (Birdman)

9:31PM – I don’t know what these guys are saying. Something about a mirror. This show sucks.

9:35PM – Please let Ricky Gervais win so he can go back on stage.

9:36PM – Nuts.

9:36PM – WINNER: Best Actor in a TV Series (Comedy/Musical) – Jeffrey Tambor (Transparent)

9:41PM – I’ve seen baseball games in the middle of a rain delay more entertaining than this show.

9:42PM – Eleven categories left plus the George Clooney achievement award. This show is definitely going to last until 2017.

9:43PM – WINNER: Best Foreign Language Film – Leviathan

9:46PM – WINNER: Best Actress in a Miniseries or TV Movie – Maggie Gyllenhaal (The Honourable Woman)

9:47PM – They misspelled the name of the miniseries in the key. It’s a British series so it’s spelled with a ‘u’.

9:53PM – WINNER: Best Television Drama – The Affair (Showtime)

9:56PM – If it hadn’t taken them two minutes to get on stage, they wouldn’t have been played off.

9:58PM – David Duchovny doesn’t care.

9:59PM – WINNER: Best Actor in a TV Series (Drama) – Kevin Spacey (House of Cards)

10:01PM – Kevin Spacey intentionally drops an F-bomb. I’m surprised they didn’t cut his mic right there and then. Now he’s telling a poignant story. The man is a king.

10:09PM – Montage time for George Clooney’s lifetime achievement award.

10:16PM – Great speech by George Clooney. He didn’t reel off a long list of people he wanted to thank but talked about how important being at the Golden Globes was for an actor. The key line was that everyone in the room had made it. He also mentioned how he was lucky to have found love and mentioned what had happened in France this week in a way that came off as very sincere and not at all sappy or preachy. If the show was more about moments like this and not about lame jokes, this would be a much more enjoyable, fulfilling, and worthwhile show.

10:21PM – “From The Grand Budapest Hotel, Owen Wilson”??? He had a cameo that lasted about five seconds. I’m sure there were dozens of extras that were in it longer.

10:23PM – WINNER: Best Director – Richard Linklater (Boyhood)

10:26PM – WINNER: Best Actress in a TV Series (Drama) – Ruth Wilson (The Affair)

10:27PM – Yay! We’re done all the TV awards. We only have the awards that matter left.

10:29PM – Five awards left; all film.

10:33PM – WINNER: Best Actor (Comedy/Musical) – Michael Keaton (Birdman)

10:34PM – Michael Keaton started off having a really jerkish acceptance speech but then he started to be sincere with his speech and it ended up being quite heart-warming.

10:45PM – WINNER: Best Picture (Comedy/Musical) – The Grand Budapest Hotel

10:46PM – Wes Anderson had the funniest speech of the night as he “thanked” the Hollywood Foreign Press personally by everyone’s name for the award.

10:48PM – So I was wrong for that category. While I thought St. Vincent was a better movie, I’m fine with The Grand Budapest Hotel winning the award. It was a better film than Birdman.

10:51PM – Apparently, they are running long. Didn’t I say that at 8:20PM?

10:52PM – WINNER: Best Actress (Drama) – Julianne Moore (Still Alice)

10:52PM – Wrong again…although I did say on the podcast that this is the category that was a complete toss-up in that anyone could have won (except Felicity Jones; not because she was bad but because nobody was talking about it). Still, it annoys me that a film can win an award without it being available in wide release for the public audience to be able to see it.

10:54PM – WINNER: Best Actor (Drama) – Eddie Redmayne (The Theory of Everything)

10:56PM – They really are steamrolling through these now. That whole segment felt rushed. It was almost like they mailed the awards out for two of the most important categories for the entire show. Now we have another commercial break.

11:00PM – Meryl Streep asks us how much we are going to miss Amy and Tina. Considering that they were hardly on the show and pretty lame, I’m thinking not much.

11:01PM – WINNER: Best Picture (Drama) – Boyhood

11:03PM – And that’s the show. I’ll be recording the post-Golden Globes podcast in a few moments. It should be up around midnight.

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